I don't normally post my emotions on facebook. In fact, I'm not sure I ever had . . . before tonight. Tonight I caved. And after posting that fateful post (and after one sad face comment and one good friend talking to me) I decided to delete it. I mean, I'm not depressed . . . or a girl :)
Anyway, after I took the post down, I was on my email account and noticed a message my mom had sent me a few days earlier. It was a video about a miracle at a hospital. Since I had the time, I decided to watch it. It was just what I needed, when I needed it. The video itself was about a doctor who felt God asking him to pray over a dead patient; and guess what, the guy ended up coming back to life. The point is this: through this video, I was just reminded of God's power. I'm not sure I can even fully put to words exactly what else I felt, but it was something that was beyond the disappointment of the night. It was God being bigger than the emotion I had felt and unnecessarily posted for the world to see. It was God showing me something of Himself and how He's worked in me. It was God being good.
Thursday, April 26, 2012
Sunday, April 8, 2012
Dating (Get Your Attention Dordt Students)
So, as an upperclassman student at good ol' Dordt College, I'm naturally worried about dating . . . ok so I'm not that worried. But still, you can't argue the dominion the topic has over the entire campus. And if you aren't from Dordt, imagine something like The Bachelor: Christian College Edition and you'll start to get the picture. But I have been thinking about the topic lately for different reasons and I've had some thoughts. These is what I've thunked:
I've thought about what a guy should be in a relationship. I look around at different relationships and "interests" and I can't help but think that that's not what those girls really need. Men are supposed to be spiritual leaders. A relationship, if it is part of God's will, will bring the two closer to God. The guy will be able to help the girl where she needs it and vice versa. A God-honoring relationship will not cause either member to have to split their time between their significant other and God, but rather the relationship, as a single entity, will provide each member a way to become closer.
So what does the guy have to do with this? The man is responsible for leading the relationship in this direction. And often times, that means leading the relationship away from other directions. One thing that will almost never fail to get under my skin is a guy who forces his girlfriend into, let's say, "non-Christian" circumstances, probably because, in the past, I've been that guy myself. Girls long for acceptance, like anyone else, and, at times, will surrender to a guy who is pursuing, let's say, the "wrong things." Men, we are responsible to make sure this doesn't happen. Can the girls play a part? Absolutely! But in the end, we are the ones who are ultimately responsible. It is a beautiful, yet difficult responsibility.
And as the head of the relationship, us guys need to take responsibility for the spiritual development of it too. Ever had this scenario: you're on a date with a girl you like and the food comes. Who prays? Do you pray? I mean, there's a lot of people around. Just do it! I've been there and I know it can feel crazy awkward, but step out on that limb. And it's obviously more than prayer. Take responsibility for leading her in the right direction, showing her that you care about her spiritual health and maturity and that you want to be a part of its improvement and growth. We are responsible for the spiritual health of the relationship - don't take that lightly. So girls, I ask you to consider - is the guy you are interested in, or even dating, fulfilling his responsibility to you? Is he leading you in the right direction? Is he leading himself in the right direction? Spiritually, is this the kind of guy you want, or should, be dating?
As an addendum, I would like to make a couple of things clear. Number one, I am not saying this from a judgmental seat of "I'm these things and others aren't." People that know my story understand that I haven't always been these things, and even now I know there are things I need to work on. Secondly, I'm not writing this to just try and impress anyone. I mean, I have another whole year to find that "special someone" before I go out into the world and am incapable of ever meeting another girl again (sounds ridiculous doesn't it senior people freaking out). Finally, I would like to make the point that I DID NOT address the idea of who should make the first move or anything of that sort . . . don't get me started.
Well, that's enough for now. The Yankees have started the season 0-3, so I'm going to go cry a little.
I've thought about what a guy should be in a relationship. I look around at different relationships and "interests" and I can't help but think that that's not what those girls really need. Men are supposed to be spiritual leaders. A relationship, if it is part of God's will, will bring the two closer to God. The guy will be able to help the girl where she needs it and vice versa. A God-honoring relationship will not cause either member to have to split their time between their significant other and God, but rather the relationship, as a single entity, will provide each member a way to become closer.
So what does the guy have to do with this? The man is responsible for leading the relationship in this direction. And often times, that means leading the relationship away from other directions. One thing that will almost never fail to get under my skin is a guy who forces his girlfriend into, let's say, "non-Christian" circumstances, probably because, in the past, I've been that guy myself. Girls long for acceptance, like anyone else, and, at times, will surrender to a guy who is pursuing, let's say, the "wrong things." Men, we are responsible to make sure this doesn't happen. Can the girls play a part? Absolutely! But in the end, we are the ones who are ultimately responsible. It is a beautiful, yet difficult responsibility.
And as the head of the relationship, us guys need to take responsibility for the spiritual development of it too. Ever had this scenario: you're on a date with a girl you like and the food comes. Who prays? Do you pray? I mean, there's a lot of people around. Just do it! I've been there and I know it can feel crazy awkward, but step out on that limb. And it's obviously more than prayer. Take responsibility for leading her in the right direction, showing her that you care about her spiritual health and maturity and that you want to be a part of its improvement and growth. We are responsible for the spiritual health of the relationship - don't take that lightly. So girls, I ask you to consider - is the guy you are interested in, or even dating, fulfilling his responsibility to you? Is he leading you in the right direction? Is he leading himself in the right direction? Spiritually, is this the kind of guy you want, or should, be dating?
As an addendum, I would like to make a couple of things clear. Number one, I am not saying this from a judgmental seat of "I'm these things and others aren't." People that know my story understand that I haven't always been these things, and even now I know there are things I need to work on. Secondly, I'm not writing this to just try and impress anyone. I mean, I have another whole year to find that "special someone" before I go out into the world and am incapable of ever meeting another girl again (sounds ridiculous doesn't it senior people freaking out). Finally, I would like to make the point that I DID NOT address the idea of who should make the first move or anything of that sort . . . don't get me started.
Well, that's enough for now. The Yankees have started the season 0-3, so I'm going to go cry a little.
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